tired of playing bad

Starting tomorrow I will have a "strict" schedule of playing 4 1250 hand sessions during the weekdays and anywhere from 1000-3000 hands on saturday and sunday. That will put me at 28-30k hands each week. My first week I was pounding out as many hands as possible with few relaxed days thrown in. I don't want to feel pressure to play more each night and this will give me an easy way to achieve the hand goal as long as I start my first session at 1pm each day.

Weekdays are a lot nittier and I end up spewing everywhere instead of playing the hand for the value it's worth. Then I make up the loss in the late afternoon and end up spewing more at night when I'm not up $2-300.

What I forsee is getting on this schedule and running like God next month making up my lost ev. I have to continue looking at the positive which is that I'm still making more doing this, which is about 25 hours a week, than working full time.

Tilt is the biggest factor limiting people's win rates. If you have a solid grasp of the game and sit back and only do things when you are picking up signs then you will do great. A player like occasio who's game I have no respect for because he's a complete nit is actually winning at just under 1 BB/100, although my goal is 2.5. There are people like prettypolly who play laggy which seems much more fun and glamorous, but it's also a lot more difficult. Stick to what you know. Plenty of nits beat higher limits than nl100

still hate everything

I've had a few points where I had a lot to say but just didn't get around to posting about it. I started off last week playing horribly for 3 days. I finally got a handle on what I was doing and thinking through a hand for the next 2 days. Then today came and I'm playing great and planning ahead in hands. My slansky line is going up again despite getting aces over kings 2-3 times more in a day than the other way around.
I thought I'd be playing tons of hands every day and rolling in money. I guess I'm glad this is happening now so that I know what it's like instead of making and spending a lot still being on a somewhat short bankroll and going on uncontrollable monkey tilt. I realize now that 40 buyins isn't that much when tilting and running bad coincide while playing 4 hours a day.
Trying to look at the bright side I should have been up $300 today despite aa > kk coolers and bluffing into the nuts twice.
The side of things is that I was down again. Even though $30 is nothing having another loss is eating at me.

i hate 09

The month so far... It's missing about 3k hands but I think it says it all. I'm not playing well as a result of running so bad.